Is there something that you want to change about yourself? Maybe it is a bad habit that you have developed over time. Maybe it is a pattern of behavior that you are currently in that isn't helping you to be all that you can be.
I am writing this article because I want people to start telling themselves the truth and start looking inside for the answers to questions about their behaviors or habits instead of blaming their past experiences and other people for their pain.
By no means am I assuming that this is going to be easy. On the contrary, I have personally been dealing with looking inward continuously and I am telling you that it will be one of the hardest things that you will do. Being honest with yourself and seeing the truth about ourselves takes a tremendous amount of courage. You may not like what you see. It is my opinion, that this is the reason why people don't look inward at their part of a situation. They may see the truth and as the old adage says "The truth hurts!". Yeah, it sure as hell does, especially when it is about oneself.
I believe that the first step in this process is to start taking responsibility for our lives. I agree that past experiences influence greatly your present behaviors but that doesn't mean that one cannot control oneself and conquer this. Just look inside and ask yourself what you can do differently and is this really what you want for yourself and your future?
If the answer to the question is "NO!" now it is time to ask "Why?". "Why am I/or why do I continue to do these things or act this way?".
Take control of yourself and don't be afraid to answer very truthfully.
I personally have blamed some of my current behaviors on past experiences. I realize that these past experiences have affected me BUT there comes a time in our lives, and the sooner the better, that we MUST STOP blaming playing the victim and start taking responsibility for ourselves and our lives.
For me taking responsibility means that you have to face the fact that each and everyday you have many decisions to make as to what is in the best interest of you and the ones you love. Being consciously aware and in control of our thoughts, is the best way to start taking responsibility. We can easily become consumed by negative thoughts that will lead us down a path that we truly DO NOT want to go down. This path of negativity will ultimately hurt ourselves and possibly the ones we love.
I urge everyone to look inside and start dealing with past hurts and take responsibility for your lives as soon as possible because looking inward at oneself and healing is what is needed in order to grow and have enduring happiness.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Short-Term Pain=Key to Empowerment
We live in a world where instant gratification is what most of us seek. Most of the struggles that we face are caused by our need to instantly gratify ourselves. Some examples that come to mind are the following. Things like weight-loss, smoking, cheating, drugs, alcohol and even sex. Basically most addictions in general are I believe caused by our need for instant gratification and our loss of control over ourselves. This need to gratify ourselves quickly leads to, in my opinion and experience, the sabotaging of our long-term goals and dreams.
With all of this being said, I strongly believe that the key to conquering these struggles is to train our minds to focus on our long-term goals and dreams. When our minds are focused on the long-term, it will make the short-term pain more bearable. This short-term pain is ultimately the key to our success in conquering and controlling ourselves and making our goals and dreams reality.
Each time that you conquer whatever struggle you are facing, whether it be a big one or a small one, if faced with this attitude you will surely succeed. Each time that you succeed you are becoming more and more empowered and in control of yourself. This is the true meaning of empowerment. Empowerment starts with a love and acceptance of yourself. Trusting in your abilities and trusting your instincts. You are in charge of yourself and therefore create your own path.
All of the above mentioned struggles, can I believe, be conquered by training your mind to focus on your long-term goals and dreams. Since I am a personal trainer, I am going to use weight-loss and healthy lifestyle as my example. Keep in mind please that this strategy can be used for most things that we struggle with. Each decision we make each day has an effect on our lives and moves us closer to or further away from our goals and dreams.
First of all you must determine what your long-term goals are and make a commitment to stick to them. Let us say that you have committed to losing weight, eating healthy and starting an exercise program. Every decision that you make from that point on is either going to move you closer or further away from your desired goal. If your goal is to lose weight, you must be aware of how much and what kinds of food that you put into your body. Let us say that you were, in the past, a fries and gravy kind of person. I can assure you that eating this type of food will take you further away from your desired goal. Here is a scene to consider. You are out at a restaurant with a group of friends. It is now your turn to place your order. You have a decision to make. Is it going to be the fries and gravy which will take you further away from your goal or will you chose the salad with chicken instead which will move you closer to your desired goal? I understand completely that if you are new to this kind of lifestyle, that this is going to be very difficult for you. I am not at all trying to say that this is easy as 123, however I am saying that with practice it can be done and made a part of your everyday life.
Keeping this in mind, I have a suggestion that I believe will work for you. Let us take the above example and use it again. You have a decision to make. Before making this decision, consciously ask yourself the question, "Is this decision moving me closer or further away from my long-term goals or dreams?". Not ordering the fries and gravy, not having that cigarette, not drinking that next drink, will cause you short-term pain because you did not instantly gratify yourself. However not doing all of these things will also move you closer to your long-term goals and dreams.
If you can train yourself to think this way and to ask yourself the above question each time you are faced with a decision that will affect your desired goal, you are well on your way to empowerment and controlling yourself. In my opinion that is true strength.
With all of this being said, I strongly believe that the key to conquering these struggles is to train our minds to focus on our long-term goals and dreams. When our minds are focused on the long-term, it will make the short-term pain more bearable. This short-term pain is ultimately the key to our success in conquering and controlling ourselves and making our goals and dreams reality.
Each time that you conquer whatever struggle you are facing, whether it be a big one or a small one, if faced with this attitude you will surely succeed. Each time that you succeed you are becoming more and more empowered and in control of yourself. This is the true meaning of empowerment. Empowerment starts with a love and acceptance of yourself. Trusting in your abilities and trusting your instincts. You are in charge of yourself and therefore create your own path.
All of the above mentioned struggles, can I believe, be conquered by training your mind to focus on your long-term goals and dreams. Since I am a personal trainer, I am going to use weight-loss and healthy lifestyle as my example. Keep in mind please that this strategy can be used for most things that we struggle with. Each decision we make each day has an effect on our lives and moves us closer to or further away from our goals and dreams.
First of all you must determine what your long-term goals are and make a commitment to stick to them. Let us say that you have committed to losing weight, eating healthy and starting an exercise program. Every decision that you make from that point on is either going to move you closer or further away from your desired goal. If your goal is to lose weight, you must be aware of how much and what kinds of food that you put into your body. Let us say that you were, in the past, a fries and gravy kind of person. I can assure you that eating this type of food will take you further away from your desired goal. Here is a scene to consider. You are out at a restaurant with a group of friends. It is now your turn to place your order. You have a decision to make. Is it going to be the fries and gravy which will take you further away from your goal or will you chose the salad with chicken instead which will move you closer to your desired goal? I understand completely that if you are new to this kind of lifestyle, that this is going to be very difficult for you. I am not at all trying to say that this is easy as 123, however I am saying that with practice it can be done and made a part of your everyday life.
Keeping this in mind, I have a suggestion that I believe will work for you. Let us take the above example and use it again. You have a decision to make. Before making this decision, consciously ask yourself the question, "Is this decision moving me closer or further away from my long-term goals or dreams?". Not ordering the fries and gravy, not having that cigarette, not drinking that next drink, will cause you short-term pain because you did not instantly gratify yourself. However not doing all of these things will also move you closer to your long-term goals and dreams.
If you can train yourself to think this way and to ask yourself the above question each time you are faced with a decision that will affect your desired goal, you are well on your way to empowerment and controlling yourself. In my opinion that is true strength.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
